Believing in Santa .....(^-^)
"Christmas always sucked when I was a kid because I believed in Santa Claus. Unfortunately, so did my parents, so I never got anything!"
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Practical Santa.....(^-^)
A little girl wrote to Santa Claus, saying the only thing she wanted for Christmas was a sister.
Santa, touched by the girl's letter, responded instantly, saying "I would love to send you a sister, but first you must send me your mother."
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Father & Son....Mother& Daughter .......(^-^)
A young boy asks his father, "Dad, is it OK for us guys to notice all the different kind of boobs?"
Surprised, the father answers, "Sure son, we wouldn't be normal if we didn't. There are all kinds of breasts and they change somewhat, depending on a woman's age.
In her twenties, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm.
In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit.
After fifty, they are like onions.
"Onions, Dad?" asked the son.
"Yeah, you see them and they make you cry."
Not to be outdone, his sister asks her mother, "Mom, how many kind of weenies are there?"
The mother, delighted to have equal time, answers,
"Well daughter, a man goes through three phases.
In a man's twenties, a man's weenie is like an oak, mighty and hard.
In his thirties and forties, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Xmas tree."
"A Xmas tree?" asked the daughter.
"Yes, dried up and the balls are only for decoration....
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